Wednesday, 4 March 2009

A children's Lenten hymn

In case you missed it, the other day Saint Egregious 
posted this hilarious little hymn in a comments thread – here it is again, for your edification and for the edification of your children:

(Sung to Old MacDonald)

Mean old Satan was a grump, e-i-e-i-o

Sat sweet Jesu on a hickory stump, e-i-e-i-o

With a tempt-tempt here and a tempt-tempt there

Here a tempt there a tempt, everywhere a tempt-tempt

Mean old Satan was a grump, e-i-e-i-o



Told Sweet Jesu he could be rich, e-i-e-i-o

Sweet Baby J ’buked that sonofabitch, e-i-e-i-o

With a left hook here and a right cross there, 

Here a bam, there a blam, everywhere a slam-slam

Man that body cast sure do itch, e-i-e-i-o

7 Comments:

Anonymous said...

maybe I'm way off the mark, but I read it as a criticism of K.F.'s hymn.

Shane said...

you got 'sonofabitch' from hauerwas.

Being more reformed, i prefer to follow plantinga in the orthography here and write it 'sumbitch' simpliciter.

sw

roger flyer said...

Where's the rest of the verses?

This is all headed toward a very bad end with Garth Brooks 'I got friends in low places.'

Please, no hymns set to Kurt Cobain tunes! (if you can call them that.)

Steve Martin said...

I think I would keep the kids away from that one until they were at least 4.

Terry said...

A hymn set to a Nirvana song, eh? There's a challenge for you, Ben.

John Hartley said...

Dear Ben,

Shouldn't the song really be a bit more tailored to a bible text? Maybe along these lines:

Jesus fasted days and nights,
E-I-E-I-O.
Satan offered bread delights,
Jesus told him "No!
Man shall not live by bread alone:
Go your way!
On your bike!
You will never catch me moaning!
You will never win your fights!"
E-I-E-I-O.

Jesus standing on the roof,
E-I-E-I-O.
Satan offered chance of proof,
Jesus told him "No!
We must not put God to the test.
Go your way!
On your bike!
You will never catch me resting!
Your misquote was just a spoof!
E-I-E-I-O.

Jesus on a mountain tower,
E-I-E-I-O.
Satan offered boundless power,
Jesus told him "No!
We only worship one true God.
Go your way!
On your bike!
You will never catch me nodding!
Your deception's just a shower!
E-I-E-I-O

Yours in Christ - JOHN HARTLEY.

Scratch Lebowski said...

John Hartley John Hartley John Hartley
wake up dog
Stop please stop I'm on my hands and knees
You're killing me dude
Aaaaarrrgggh

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